Smash Hands
by Dotson
Summary: Oh yeah! Read it and weep for there is much weeping to be done.


4

_Mordecai and Rigby walking through a store._

Mordecai: This place is awesome.

Rigby: Yeah you can buy anything here. Look that guy's got chairs.

Mordecai: And that guy's got wood.

Rigby: And that guy's got a moustache.

Mordecai: Yeah he does.

Rigby: So what should we get?

Mordecai: Well we could use a new video game. That last one we got was a total bust.

_Mordecai and Rigby are sitting on the couch with controllers. On the T.V. there is a book. A sign is flashing in front of it. It says "PRESS A TO TURN PAGE." Rigby presses the controller. T.V. again. The book page flips to the next page. Words appear on the screen. "LEVEL TWO." "BEGIN."_

_Back at the store._

Rigby: Yeah that game was pretty lame.

_A clerk walks up to them._

Clerk: Can I help you gentlemen?

Mordecai: We need a new video game. What's the coolest video game you have?

Clerk: Ah Master Killapede. It's flippin' awesome mans. You're like this killer millipede and

you like master your own destiny. It's the greatest story ever sold.

_Mordecai and Rigby turn toward each other._

Mordecai: Dude we have to get this game.

Rigby: I'm practically foaming at the mouth for this game.

Mordecai: We'll take it. How much is it?

Clerk: $50.

Rigby: We've got this.

_Rigby pulls out some coins._

Clerk: These are tokens.

_Close-up of Rigby's hand. There are some tokens with a smiling rat giving a thumbs up._

Clerk: I can't accept those.

Mordecai: Why not? They're just as good as cash.

Mordecai (quieter): At the arcade.

Clerk: Well come back when you have actual cash.

_Mordecai and Rigby walking down an aisle._

Rigby: We need some money.

Mordecai: Awe look a bin of free stuff!

_Mordecai and Rigby start digging through the bin._

Rigby: What are those?

Mordecai: Folk hands?

_Mordecai is wearing some oversized hands. He hits them together._

Hands: If'n I were a redneck… _banjo music plays._

Rigby: Those are lame, but check these puppies out.

_Rigby's holding up two giant red foam hands with a tag on them that says "Smash Hands."_

Mordecai: Those look so cool.

_Rigby is wearing them now. He hits them together._

Smash Hands: Smash. Smash.

Mordecai: Come on let me wear them now.

Rigby: No way. I'm wearing them home.

_Mordecai and Rigby are walking down the street. Rigby is punches a mailbox and it breaks._

Rigby: Mailcall.

_Rigby punches a telephone pole and it breaks too._

Rigby: Line's busy.

_Rigby's about to punch a baby carriage._

Mordecai: Come on man let me try them.

_Rigby looks at the baby carriage._

Rigby: Oh alright.

_Rigby tries to pull them off, but they won't budge. He tries putting them on the ground and pulling it off with his foot._

Rigby: Mordecai help me. They're stuck.

_Mordecai tries pulling one off. Then Rigby hits him with his other arm._

Mordecai: Cut it out man. I'm trying to help.

Rigby: I didn't mean to.

_Mordecai grabs for the smash hands again._

_Rigby punches Mordecai twice. The top of Rigby's arm where the Smash Hands end starts to turn red._

Rigby: I'm smashin' out man!

_Rigby punches through a building and runs through it punching things in his path._

_Back at the house Skips is washing his car. Mordecai runs up to him._

Mordecai: Skips I need your help.

Skips: Where's Rigby?

Mordecai: I don't know.

Skips: For the last time Mordecai I can't help you cheat in Hide and Seek.

Mordecai: No this is serious. Rigby and I were at the store…

Skips: That does sound serious.

Mordecai (speaking quickly): and we found this bin of free stuff and Rigby found these hands. They were big and red. He had them on and then he couldn't quit punching things. He burst through a wall and I couldn't catch up to him.

Skips: I've seen this before. Those are Smash Hands. A long time ago there was a monster that roamed this city. He smashed through everything. They called him the Sensational Smasher. I was the only one who could stop his destruction. The only way to defeat the Smasher is to remove his hands. But you have to remove them before he's completely transformed.

Mordecai: What happens if you do it after he's transformed?

_Skips sheds a single tear._

Skips: Let's find him.

Mordecai: How?

_Pops rides up on a moped._

Pops: Mordecai, Rigb…Oh. Where's Rigby?

Skips: Rigby's missing.

Pops: Well I hope he's ok. There's a big red monster smashing things downtown.

Mordecai: Pops you have to take us to the monster.

Pops: Sure. Hop on.

_Pops pats the seat behind him twice._

_Mordecai gets on the scooter. Close-up of the throttle. Pops revs it. Close-up of the back wheel and the scooter peels out. Wide shot of the scooter barely moving down the road. Skips drives up next to them._

Skips: Why don't you come with me?

_Skips is driving with Mordecai in the passenger seat. They're looking around._

Skips: Where is he?

_A giant red bulked out Rigby runs in front of the car. Rigby turns his head to the right looking at the car. Close-up of Rigby's face._

Rigby: Help me. Mordecai.

_Skips turns the car and follows the Rigby's path through the grass. Rigby is smashing the ground and throwing it back at them. The car is dodging the debris._

Mordecai: Ready Pops?

_Skips opens up the hood of the car and Pops is sitting in there. Skips slams on the breaks; flinging Pops toward Rigby. Pops tackles Rigby. Mordecai and Skips run up to them._

Rigby: Mordecai get these hands off of me.

Mordecai: The only way is to cut them off.

Rigby: Cut off my breadwinners? I could never do that. Well I guess I wouldn't mind living like this. I mean with this rockin' body I could get any chick I want.

_Rigby is fantasizing about himself standing on a beach. A woman in a bikini touches his giant red peck with her finger and giggles._

_Back in the present._

Rigby: Aw yeah.

Mordecai: Enough Rigby. This is serious. We have to get those hands off before you've completely transformed.

Rigby: I will be king of the beach. Never!

_Rigby punches Mordecai who goes flying off and hits a tree trunk._

Skips: Rigby this is for your own good.

Rigby: Screw good. All I wants to do is smash!

_Rigby punches Skips away too._

_Pops grabs Rigby from behind and slams him over his head onto the ground._

Rigby: Big head man hurt me. Now I hurt him. Smash. Smash him.

Pops: Rigby your grammar is becoming atrocious. Although to be fair it was never good to begin with.

_Rigby punches Pops away._

_Mordecai is heard off in the distance._

Mordecai: I'll end this Rigby.

Rigby: Nothing you can do can hurt me!

Mordecai: Oh yeah. How about these!

_Mordecai pulls his arms out from behind his back. He is wearing Folk Hands._

_Mordecai smashes them together._

Folk Hands: If'n I were a redneck.

Rigby: No.

Folk Hands: They call me sunshine.

Rigby: It's awful!

Folk Hands: Gibba jabba.

_Rigby holds his hand up to his ears._

_Skips runs up to him and grabs Rigby's right hand. He gently twists it off. The right side of Rigby's body turns the normal color. Skips twists the other hand off too._

_Rigby glows a bright light. When the light is gone he is back to normal._

Rigby: Thinking much clearer. No want smash anymore. Ugh thanks guys. That was horrible.

Mordecai: No prob dude. I like you better this way.

Rigby: I thought you were going to cut off my hands.

Skips: I never said you had to cut them off. Just remove them. You guys should really pay more attention to what people are saying.

Rigby: What?

END


End file.
